[ode to bob]

so im on facebook and i see mike wrote on boobers wall.
"get well soon"
wtf? is he okay?
i grew curious and worried so i asked people what happened to bobbington bear.
and these are the replies i got.
"surgery on his penis."
"Thana's new status message: BEST COAST" (which means he saw my IM, but decided not to answer me. instead he put up a new status which now i am also curious about)
"facial reconstructive surgery"
"he's having surgery to replace his face with a guy named castor troy. he's doing it so he can get information from his brother about where the bomb is."
"generic surgery" (that ones from me) (okay actually no one asked me yet but i wanted to get in on this too cause i got really excited about having a funny answer)
finally julia answers me. but then she lectures me on my sleep apnea and sends me links on how to fix it and blablhablah.
all i wanted is a simple answer.

my coworker's daughter is all pregnant and shit. she came in and stopped by. all of my coworkers usually gawk at her. now, they completely ignore her. its pretty funny. we got company paid lunch upstairs. for the first time in 3 years, i saw him walk upstairs.

to my new readers. "mr betes" is pronounced "beat-ees" like diabetes. its not his real name, but a code name. i refer to him as mr betes cause the warehouse guys make fun of him for having diabetes and he didn't know it. its fucked up right? work with him and you'll think differently.
average blood sugar level is around 80-110 or 120 or some shit.
mine was regular (surprisingly)
his? 400+.
true story.

get well bob! oh and if u haven't figured out, hes having surgery on his ankles. cause i broke them on the basketball court the other day.