[gym stories 3]

mr betes asked me to give him a ride to the auto shop where his car was being repaired. keep in mind this guy is one big motherfucker. like i was actually afraid he wouldn't fit in my passenger seat. seriously. so he squeezed himself in there. my car is now 45 degrees leaning his side. it looks like when that lady put a rack of ribs on fred flintstones car.
mr betes: "damn larry your car sure is small"
me (thinking): yeah i'm sure thats it.
and i turn on Usher OMG.
mr betes: who is this?
me: Usher.
mr betes: from boyz ii men?
me: noo.
mr betes: he's from atlanta right?
me: actually yeah
mr betes: yeah i know who this guy is. he's the guy from boyz ii men
me: no....he's not man!
mr betes: shit you don't know nothing. i'm from atlanta. i know my city.
me: well you need to get your facts checked.
mr betes: he wrote the song yeah?
me: yeah.
mr betes: yeah he used to be in a group that had a song "i swear"
me: you're getting mixed up with a lot of different black guys
mr betes: whoa whoa whoa man i'm not being racist

it literally seemed like he was joking with me.

so i walk into the apartment complex gym. aw damn it. latin kings. just kidding but one huge mexican family. not kidding.
and half of them are crowded over the tv watching the telemundo channel. being serious, not being racist. half of them are on the cardio machine, but its okay cause theres still one for me. i run for a couple miles and get off. i got off, took the disinfectant paper towel and wiped down my machine. the whole mexican family looks at me. and literally they all go to the dispenser and wipe down every machine.
i'm guessing that they haven't been wiping down their shit which is kinda gross.

i sit in my chair and i hear all these conversations. some gross, some funny, and some i want to be part of. like theories on lost, or nba finals, or movie talk. beardy just gets up and joins in.
coworker#1: yeah i just thought kobe had an off night man.
coworker#2: wasn't his best day.
beardy: yall talkin bout finals?
coworker#3: yeah man it was a good game but not for kobe.
beardy: you said it......blahblahblah and so on.

me?
coworker#1: dark knight...best comic book movie of all time.
coworker#2: spider man. i'm more marvel.
i try to get in on the conversation. so i sneak in there.
coworkers#2: whats up larry what can i do for you
(sigh)
larry: (damn it whyd you have to put me on the spot like that. now i feel awkward) do you know when dave is coming in?
cowrker#1: i think he's coming in at 10 i think.
larry: OH cool okay thanks!
and i walk away.
i guess i am socially awkward too.

whats even more awkward? i had a dream that i rode in a train with tom brokaw. and in the middle of our conversation i said "thats the tom brokaw experience" and we started laughing.

k bye.